In a bombshell wikileak, classified emails from the then 2010 POTUS Barack Obama show the president colluding with the Surgeon General to have 37 States pump copious amounts of soy to the inmate population for what experts believe to be an elaborate ploy to control population growth. All this through …
Read More »Man clings to life support from E. Coli after trend ‘eating’ wifes “a**”
Syracuse NY – a man clings to life support after conracting E. Coli fromm one of the most probable sources: his wifes fecal matter. Johnathan Westcott and his wife Maria wanted to introduce something new to thier love life and after talking with friends and familiy he decided (with his …
Read More »Microsoft offering 6 months of Xbox Live for posting a profile photo in drag to promote LBGTQ community
After an outpouring of demands by the LBGTQ Community for Microsoft to “do more” to promote the LBGTQ agenda, Microsoft has decided to offer its users 3 free months of its premium XBox Live service if they post a profile photo being in drag to their user Avatar for 7 …
Read More »CDC shuts down Cardi B concert amid herpes outbreak
NY – after Cardi B’s installation of her new gold grill a particular problem arose, saliva. A lot of saliva. So much spit excretes from cardi B’s mouth when she raps because of her new gold underbite, that the first few rows of fans literally get “sprayed” to the point …
Read More »Make-a-Wish teen wishes for private show from porn star Stormy Daniels
Atlanta Georgia – a seventeen-year-old Make-A-Wish Foundation teenager shocked the foundation by reportedly wishing for a private show from the popular pornographic actress Stormy Daniels, as well as a “happy ending” whatever that may entail. Bryon Singer, who is currently suffering from a life-threatening case of engorged testicles from the …
Read More »NFL bans transsexual ‘hoggett’ fans from stadiums – LBGT in an uproar
The Hogettes — a group of male Washington Redskins fans who wear women’s dresses and pig snouts to NFL games to cheer on their beloved Redskins are being discriminated against in one of the worst ways imaginable, by being banned from entry to all 32 NFL stadiums in a move …
Read More »New study claims marijuana use may lead to homosexuality
UCLA’s Medical Science Department led by scientific professor and Scholar Hans Juergen released a 247 page scholarly medical article loosely relating recreational marijuana use to it then creating a yearning for homosexual activity. Doctor Juergen’s hypothesis stems around the oral fixation one gets from inhaling marijuana smoke from fixed paraphernalia …
Read More »1 death reportedly attached to internet challenge ‘No Nut November’
NATIONAL: according to multiple affiliate reports there have been over a dozen hospital visits as well as 1 death in relation to the internet challenge taking the states by storm — ‘No Nut November’. This internet challenge dares men to stop ejaculating for the entire month of November to raise …
Read More »Meet Mr. Gaga the world’s first transgender dog sex change operation success
Ever since adopting the Pitbull mix named Gaga from the Helping Hounds animal shelter in Providence Rhode Island, Pat and Pat Crump knew there was something terribly off with Gaga’s demeanor. He always seemed anxious. Just not himself. Multiple times we found Mister Gaga trying to nurse our cats kittens, …
Read More »State prisons cave, allow Sikhs to have Kirpans (religious swords) in prison
WASHINGTON — The Supreme Court on Tuesday unanimously ruled that state corrections officials in several states had violated the religious liberty rights of Sikh inmates by forbidding them to hold their religious swords while incarcerated. The case concerned Guru Granth Sahib, who is serving a life sentence for burglary, rape …
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