As absurd as it sounds, Trump’s penis has been covered by the mainstream news quite a bit. CNN literally wrote about it here and here among many other media sources. But it came as a shock to read about the presidential phallus in the White House medical exam earlier this …
Read More »Monthly Archives: April 2019
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez to Propose a Nationwide Wood Stove ban
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is taking a page out of the 2012 EPA playbook. Doubling down on the original regulations and proposing a bill that will outright ban all wood burning stoves by 2020. She held a rally outside of capitol hill today with one main goal in mind: The health of …
Read More »Wanda Sykes to star in Mandalorian season 2 Star Wars Spin Off.
While details are scarce about the most recent Star Wars spin off update, cheers for diversity can be heard at LucasFilm headquarters today. Film producer Kathleen Kennedy and Jon Favreau at Disney together announced the monumental decision to cast Wanda Sykes, a multi talented gay and African American woman as …
Read More »FAKE NEWS – Biden’s campaign irate over phony campaign shirt many news outlets thought was real
Joe Biden’s campaign is livid and for good reason, they are victims of a fake news conundrum. There are phony campaign shirts in circulation mocking the hopeful candidate and they were mistakenly displayed by several mainstream news outlets and thousands of affiliates. CNN and ABC both displayed shirts labeled Joe …
Read More »Hollywood — Brie Larson (written out of Avengers) working with Alt-right Richard Spencer on new documentary
Last month our offices received an anonymous story which we wrote off as rabble rousing by internet users, but two very interesting sources have came to our field reporter and chief editor Marc Stiffener confirming what our tipster wrote. Sources say Brie Larson is being written out of the avengers …
Read More »Catholic priest hospitalized after crucifix removed from rectum.
Albany – A 47 year old Catholic priest was rushed to Albany Medical Center today under some deeply private Matters. Father Bobby Capri was admitted shortly after calling 911 to report a fall in the shower and that he “couldn’t get up”. EMT’s noted that Father Capri had just the …
Read More »VERMONT – High School senior Sues his parents for being white. Updated.
Springfield Vermont. High School senior David Wright is breaking legal ground by initiating one of the most controversial lawsuits of 2019. David is suing his biological parents, for being white. David, 18, claims the weight of Shame bestowed on him by his parents simply for being white is at times …
Read More »Mixed breed dog escapes from shelter, crosses Expressway to maul toddler at Park.
AUGUSTA GEORGIA — The Augusta city pound has to answer questions from the mayor today as to why a pit bull was allowed to exit the shelter and maim more victims only hours before his scheduled lethal injection. Half border collie half pit bull, Mr. Pibbles, made the front page …
Read More »Iranian scientist believes he has discovered a cure to homosexuality
Iran – Dr. Mohammad Saladin and his veteran team of researchers are all smiles today at the Iranian Institute for religious science. Saladin and his team claimed to remove and cure symptoms of homosexuality completely if treated at a young age. The proprietary inoculation stems from a research article published …
Read More »BREAKING: Wanted convict on the run: Crimes include murder & child molestation. Not a good swimmer.
BREAKING: The man pictured, Max Cady is wanted and extremely dangerous. He has changed his appearance some since this last known photo. Police have reason to believe that he has since paid a dentist to grind down his teeth. He has grown his hair out to shoulder length and has …
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