Lampoon Tribune The most trusted news on the net. Facts first.
Dr. Fry. J. Cook has informed us that Burger King’s impossible Whopper can cure Corona / covid19 in men as long as appropriate daily consumption is met for a 30 day regimen, by overloading the system with estrogen and or estrogen mimickers.
“US doctors have started giving men with coronavirus ESTROGEN in the hopes of boosting their immune systems after finding the virus kills half as many women”
In conjunction with the recent soy study Dr. Fry J. Cook has created a meal prep plan that’s set to heal the nations men in record time. Dr. Cook states”
“It sounds tough but any adult male over 150lbs should be eating 5 or 6 Impossible Whoppers each day for 30 says. 150 to 180 whopper Patties must be consumed to hit appropriate levels of soy and estrogen to offer communicable health benefits for combatting covid19. What are you guys waiting for? Coupons can be found on the website for all covid19 positive males.”
Side effects of impossible Whopper may lead to crying over dramatic movies and puppy commercials, but is also not limited to going up one size in breast cup.
Exciting news in the medical industry. Thoughts? Sound off below in the comments.
